Unwritten
by SVUjunkie2011
Summary: Olivia is retiring, finding herself outside what she's always known. Can she leave Detective Benson behind and just be Olivia. For Olivia the rest is still unwritten but she plans on finding what she is looking for.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

**a/n sadly I don't own them :(**

She needed to talk to him. The longer she put it off the harder it was to tell him. They'd wrapped a really hard case in the early hours of the morning of May 3rd, Cragen had sent them home for 24 hours off. On the way out of the squad room Olivia had asked Elliot to come over later if he wasn't doing anything with his kids. Once at the elevators Elliot told her he didn't get the kids for another week so tonight sounded great. They decided Elliot would bring the beer and Olivia would order takeout from their favorite Chinese place. It was six in the morning when Olivia made it in her front door. She tossed her keys & purse on the counter. Taking off her boots and socks, she tossed them to the floor. She left a string of clothing on the way to her bedroom. She'd toss it in the hamper later. Once inside the confines of her bedroom Olivia grabbed an oversized NYPD t-shirt from an open dresser draw and quickly put it on. When she was dressed Olivia closed the shades and curtains. Walking over to her nightstand Olivia set the alarm for 1PM even though she knew sleep would likely not last that long. A lot was weighing on her mind these past few weeks and falling asleep was when her mind began to wander. But Olivia was too exhausted this morning. She was asleep within minutes of her head hitting the pillow.

When she woke hours later it was nearly 1PM. Deciding she wasn't ready to get up, Olivia rolled over & pulled the covers up to her chin. Before drifting back off to sleep, Olivia shut the alarm off. It was her cell phone ringing that woke Olivia hours later. Looking at the clock Olivia saw it was 3:30PM. Elliot would be here in a few hours she thought, better get up. Throwing the covers back Olivia sat up and ran her hand through her shoulder length hair. Swinging her legs over the side of the bed Olivia stood up and walked to the kitchen to start the coffee. While the coffee was brewing Olivia hopped in the shower. Letting the water beat down on her body, Olivia's mind began to think about all the things she needed to do, everything she needed to tell Elliot. Deciding to deal everything that was on her mind later Olivia quickly finished her shower. Olivia stepped out of the tub wrapped a towel around her head and one around her body. With the towel secured Olivia walked out of the bathroom and headed to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Mug in hand Olivia walked back to her bedroom, picking up the forgotten cell phone on her way. She hit the home button, the phone showed a missed call and a text from Elliot.

The text read: tried to call but you must still be asleep. Just wanted to make sure we were still on for tonight. Thought I'd come over a little early but if I don't hear from you I'll be there around 6.

Olivia quickly typed out a message back to Elliot that read yeah we're still on for tonight. I'll be here so come over as early as you want. Don't forget the beer, Stabler.

Happy with the message Olivia sent the text. Tossing the phone in the bed, Olivia walked over to her closet to pick out a fitted t-shirt and her favorite pair of blue jeans. After she tossed the clothes on the bed, Olivia walked over to her dresser to pick out a matching bra and panty set. Back on the bed Olivia dropped her towel and started getting ready. Leaving the towel on her head Olivia went into the bathroom to put on a light layer of makeup. After doing her makeup Olivia walked into the living room do tidy up a bit. There's not really much to do because Olivia was hardly home enough to dirty her apartment. That will be changing soon though, Olivia thought. A smile graced her face for the first time in a few days. She'll need a bigger place but not for a while. Her cell phone ringing brings her back to the present. It was a text from Elliot saying he would be there within the hour. After responding back to the text Olivia went into the bathroom to blow dry her hair. When her hair was dry she pluged her curling iron in and curled her hair. Satisfied with her appearance Olivia flipped the bathroom light off and went into the kitchen to get the takeout menu. Not that she needed it, she knows the number like she knows her own name. Hell she's on a first name base with the people who work there. Flipping thru the folder of takeout menus she keeps in a drawer, Olivia found the Chinese menu and opens it. She's in the mood for her favorites but wants to spice it up a little bit. Olivia knew what Elliot wanted, like her he rarely ever changed his eating habits. Dialing the number, Olivia waited for someone to take her order, when they answered she placed her order. They told her it would be ready & delivered in 45 minutes.

To pass the time until Elliot arrived Olivia opens her laptop and powers it on. The laptop was an old piece of junk, takes forever I power on and lags a lot. A friend had been offering her summer home to Olivia when she needed a vacation. Last week Olivia had talked to Haley an mentioned she was thinking of taking a vacation. Haley told her the offer still stands for her to use the house in North Carolina. Olivia began to research things to do in the small beach town, not that she planned on doing much of anything but sleeping. Lost in her search, she didn't hear her phone sound when a text came through. The knock at the door brought Olivia back to the present. Startled out of her vacation planning Olivia closed her laptop and sat it back down on her desk. Olivia walked over to the mirror hanging by the door to check her makeup and calm herself down a little. It was only Elliot she told herself. She prayed he would understand what she was about to tell him. Taking a deep breath Olivia opened the apartment door. Elliot stood there holding the beer and the bag of Chinese.

"Elliot, you were supposed to bring the beer. I was getting the food," Olivia said as she stepped to the side so he could enter the apartment.

Sitting the food on the counter, Elliot opened the fridge and put the beer on the top shelf. "Yeah but i bumped into the delivery boy on my way into the building. He thinks you're hot by the way," Elliot said grinning.

"He does not. I'm old enough to be his mother."

"I'm just telling you what he said. Too bad I stopped him downstairs because I'd have to agree with him. You look good, Liv. Happy. I like it."

"Lets eat" Olivia says, avoiding the fact Elliot had just told her he thought she looked good. Elliot grabbed two bottles of beer and the bag of takeout while Olivia found silverware and napkins. They loved Chinese food but Elliot had never mastered the art of chopsticks. Olivia settled on one end of the couch and Elliot made himself at home on the end. They had sat this way on the couch many times over the last fourteen years but Elliot thought it felt different tonight.

They made small talk while they ate. Olivia asked about the kids and watched as Elliot's face lit up with fatherly pride. Maureen had just got an internship at a law firm, Kathleen is studying photography, the twins had just started their freshman year at Hudson, and Eli was entering kindergarten. Olivia loved to hear Elliot talk about his kids. The way he changed from cop to father always made her smile. Olivia especially liked to hear about Eli and his latest antics.

"You're been pretty quite tonight. Liv, what's up?" Elliot said sitting down his empty food carton. He then turned himself around on the couch to to face Olivia, waiting for an answer.

Olivia, unable to look at Elliot, sat her empty food carton on the table. She let out the sigh she had been holding since the second Elliot stepped into her apartment.

"I'm retiring"

"Retiring?"

"I'm tired, Elliot. I've got my twenty on the force. It's been my life but I don't want it to be the rest of my life. I need to know who I am outside of this job," Olivia said with tears in her eyes. When Elliot said nothing Olivia continued, "I'm just tired. I've talked to Cregan, my last official day is friday."

"What will you do after that?"

"I told Cregan I'd stay on as a consultant when SVU needed help but for now I'm going to take a long deserved vacation. I just wanted to tell you before i told everyone else," Olivia turned to look at Elliot, hoping he would say something.

" Why didn't you tell me you were thinking about leaving?" Elliot asked. Olivia could hear the crack in his voice.

"I just...I guess I thought if i said something about wanting to leave you might try to talk me out of it and I...I need this. I need to find a life outside SVU," Olivia said.

Elliot remained silent, staring at his hands resting on his thighs. Olivia watched him, unable to tear her eyes away from him.

"I wish you had told me, I would have supported whatever you wanted to do, Olivia. I want you to be happy. Just promise you won't forget us."

"You think I'd forget you guys? You're my best friend, Elliot. You and the guys are the closest thing I have to a family. I'll never forget you all" Olivia said, reaching over to give his hand a squeeze.

"I...uh I need to tell you something and i need you to hear me out before you say anything. Can you do that?" Elliot said as he held Olivia's gaze.

"Yeah" Olivia said. Her voice shaking with worry. Her mind was running a mile a minute, wondering what he needed to tell her.

Before saying anything Elliot scooted closer to her on the couch, taking her smaller into his own. Olivia's eyes were trained on their joined hands. Elliot had never held her hands like this before, which only added to her worry a to what he needed to say.

"I don't know why it has taking me so long to say this to you. I've been divorced for almost two years now but I still never acted on this. Liv, I've thought of you as more than a partner for a long time. More than a partner, more than my best friend. I see you as a strong, beautiful woman with a big heart. I...uh...I'm trying to say I want...you know what, just forget I said anything" Elliot said, getting up to look out the window.

"El, just tell me. What ever it is. If it's bothering you please tell me. Please just tell me" Olivia pleaded. When he remained silent Olivia stood up and made her way over to Elliot.

Elliot turned to look at her. She was standing so close. Elliot stepped closer to Olivia, he could hear her breathing speed u. Rather than tell Olivia what he was feeling, Elliot decided to show her. Before Olivia knew what was happening, Elliot pulled her against him. His lips were on hers, passion and warmth felt between the two. Elliot's hands were around her waist, unable to resist Olivia wrapped her hands around his neck. The kiss was unlike any other kiss Olivia had experienced in her life. This kiss was about love. Breaking the kiss Elliot rested his forehead against Olivia's. Her eyes were closed , Elliot wondered what she was thinking. Elliot moved his hands from Olivia's back to cup her face. When Olivia felt his hands on her face she opened her eyes to look at Elliot. They held each others gaze for what seemed like an eternity. Elliot gave her a quick kiss on he lips.

"What I wanted to tell you is that I love you, Olivia Benson. I'm in love with you, I have been for a long time. This is something I should have done a long time ago. I guess hearing you tell me you were leaving made me realize that I can't lose you, that I want more with you than just our partnership at work. You are a part of me, you and my kids make me who I am. Olivia, you keep me calm and grounded. When I'm around you..." before Elliot could finish what he was saying he felt Olivia press her lips to his. The kiss was soft and sweet, as if Olivia was conveying her words through the kiss. Elliot wrapped his arms around Olivia and pulled her closer.

"I never planned on leaving you, Elliot. I mean who is going to keep you out of trouble? Certainly not Munch or Fin. Cragen? No. It's always been me and I wouldn't have it any other way. This feels right, you and me," Olivia said with a smile. She took Elliot's and led him to the couch. Elliot lifted his legs and put his feet on the coffee table, his left arm around Olivia's shoulders. Elliot absentmindedly played with Olivia's hair. His free hand entwined with Olivia's. Elliot brought their joined hands up and kissed her.

"This is nice" Olivia said, resting her head on his shoulder. They sat there for a little while chit chatting about everything and cuddling. Eventually Olivia took Elliot's hand and led him to her bedroom. Olivia went to close the door but Elliot grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to him. Olivia laughed and ran her hands over Elliot's chest. The pair exploring the newness the relationship. Olivia pulled away to close the door. Leaving them to explore each other in ways they had both imagined but never thought possible.


	2. Chapter 2

**a/n sadly I don't own them. Special thanks to Audrey(WinterWhirls on here & DavidDucuffme on twitter) for encouraging me to write and looking over the updates before I post. **

Olivia woke the next morning with Elliot's arm around her waist. For the first time in a long time Olivia felt relaxed and refreshed. She couldn't remember the last time she had a good night's sleep. It had become a rarity in her life. The clock on her nightstand said it was 7am, Cragen had told them to be back in the squadroom by 9:30. Deciding to enjoy this moment of peace Olivia closed her eyes and moved her arm to rest on top of Elliot's. The alarm wasn't set to go off until 8am anyway. Elliot pulled her closer to him and buried his face in her neck. They had fallen asleep in the middle of the bed but they had ended up with Olivia on her side of the bed and Elliot in the middle. Once Olivia was snug against Elliot she drifted back off to sleep.

The next time Olivia woke up it was to Elliot playing with her hair. The clock this time said 8:05am. Olivia rolled over to lay flat on her back. Elliot was laying on his side, his elbow propped up with his head resting on his hand.

"Mmm, good morning," Olivia said with a smile as she stared up at Elliot.

"Morning," Elliot said as he leaned down to place a kiss on her lips. Elliot let his lips linger on Olivia's for a moment. He loved being able to kiss her now. One thing was for sure, he knew it would be hard to keep his hands off of Olivia today.

"Maybe we should call in today, take a personal day? We could definitely use it," Elliot said. They could use a personal day but they had been off yesterday so that put a damper on that. SVU couldn't be shorthanded for too long.

Olivia smiled. "As much as I'd love that we both know Cragen would have our asses, especially if he knew why we both asked for a personal day."

"I don't think I'll be able to think straight today. Not when I picture you wearing nothing but a sheet," Elliot said. He'd laid his head back in his hand but was using his free hand to trace his fingers over Olivia's skin. Elliot brought his hand up to cup her face and traced her bottom lip with his thumb. It was moments like this he was going to remember forever. "Well, since you shot down my idea to call in we had better get ready for work. You grab a shower and I'll go grab my bag from the car. I will shower when you get out. Then we can get some breakfast before work," Elliot said as he rolled out of bed.

"You aren't going to join me in the shower?" Olivia asked, sitting up with the sheet around her waist.

"I'd love to but then we would be late for work and I don't think we want to explain that. Now go get a shower," Elliot said.

Olivia waited until she heard her front door close before she swung her legs over the bed, letting her feet hit the floor. She walked naked into her bathroom, closing the door. Ten minutes later Olivia emerged from her shower to find Elliot lying on the bed, hands resting behind his head. Olivia had a towel wrapped around her body and a clip in her damp hair. She walked over to her dresser and opened the top drawer. She examined the contents, deciding on a matching black lacy bra and panty set. Olivia turned around and tossed the items on the bed. Olivia held the towel to her body as she walked over to the closet to pick an outfit for the day. When she turned back around Olivia saw Elliot holding her underwear.

"You're really going to wear these?" Elliot asked, examining the barely lacy material.

"What? You don't like them?" Olivia asked, amused.

"Oh I like them but how am I supposed to work today? When I know you're these?" Elliot said, tossing the lacy boyshorts over to the other side of the bed.

"Hmm…Well I could wear nothing under my cloths. Yeah maybe I'll do that then you can explain to Cragen why you can't stay focused on the job," Olivia said.

"Uh, no you should definitely wear this little scrap of lace you call underwear and I'll spend the day thinking about taking them off of you when we get back here tonight," Elliot said, getting up off the bed. He headed into the bathroom for a quick shower.

Olivia sat down on the edge of the bed and grabbed her lotion off the nightstand. She pulled her panties on and was hooking clasp on her bra when Elliot emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later. Once the bra was clasped shut Olivia began to apply the lotion to her body.

"Never figured you for one to spend a lot of time getting ready, Liv," Elliot said. He made the short walk over to the chair Olivia had sitting by the large window in her room. He unzipped his duffel and pulled out a pair of boxer briefs. Elliot put them on and turned back around to face Olivia but he found that she was completely dressed and walking into her bathroom. All Elliot saw was her backside as she walked into the bathroom.

"What do you was for breakfast?" Elliot yelled from the bedroom.

"The diner? A big breakfast sounds really good today. I think we deserve it after last night," Olivia said, poking her head out of the bathroom with a big smile on her face. Olivia went back to getting ready in the bathroom.

"Sounds good to me. How much longer until you're ready to go?" Elliot asked. He was now fully dressed and making the bed.

"You make it sound like I spend all my time in the bathroom doing my hair and makeup," Olivia said as she walked out the bathroom with her hair and makeup done. She went over to her closet and pulled out a black blazer to match her slacks. Olivia opened her nightstand and withdrew her badge and service weapon. They walked into the living room and Olivia grabbed her purse and a few files. They left the apartment and rode the elevator to the ground floor. When they were outside Elliot wrapped his arm around Olivia's waist. Olivia smiled, thinking about how easily they settled into this relationship. Truthfully they had been in this relationship for 13 year, the only new part of it was the kissing and sex. They stared at each other for a brief moment before Elliot leaned in for a quick kiss. They made the short walk to Elliot's car in silence, neither wanting to let this moment go. For at least the next 8 hours they would just be Benson and Stabler, partners, nothing more and nothing less. They both knew that was the way it needed to be for the time being. For the next week they would be partners and lovers without letting their coworkers know about the latter. Olivia couldn't help but wonder if the squad would notice the shift in the partnership even if she and Elliot were able to hide it. Elliot held the door open for Olivia then went around to the driver's side. When they were both seat belted in Elliot pulled out onto the street. Elliot reached over and gave Olivia's knee a squeeze, she turned her head and smiled at him then placed her head on top of his.

When they arrived at the diner they ordered their usual and made small talk about the day and their plans after. Elliot looked at Olivia and saw the uneasiness in her features. Olivia sat there on her side of the booth looking out the window she was so lost in thought she didn't notice Elliot get up and come around to her side to sit down. She only noticed when Elliot placed his hand on her thigh. Olivia turned her body and gave him a sad smile.

"What were you thinking about?" Elliot asked, though he already knew the answer.

"Just thinking these next few days will be our last working together, going to breakfast before work. I'll no longer be a cop," Olivia said.

"You could always be like Munch and come out of retirement. You and me? You are stuck with me forever now as far as I'm concerned. I'm not saying it's going to be easy but I know we can do it. I may be losing you as my partner at work but I'm gaining you as my partner in life," Elliot said.

Before Olivia could respond the waitress walked up to the booth with their food. They remained quiet for most of the meal. They made small talk every now and then. Neither mentioned Olivia's last week of work. When they were finished with breakfast Elliot walked up to the counter to pay and get 2 coffees to go while Olivia went outside. From the counter Elliot watched Olivia lean against the car and look up to the sky. After a minute she closed her eyes and tried to relax a little. Elliot knew by the time they made it to work she would be ok. He walked out the door and up to Olivia, she looked at him and took the cup he offered.

"Everything is going to be ok, Liv," Elliot said. He grabbed Olivia's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Olivia smiled and nodded. She leaned forward and placed a kiss on his lips. Elliot moved around Olivia to open her door. When she was in the car Elliot shut the door and walked over to his side.

Elliot made the short drive to the precinct and parked the car. Olivia stared out the windshield at the building.

"Well, let's get this over with," Olivia said with a huff.

They got out of the car and walked up the steps of the precinct. Olivia was silent in the elevator on the way up to their floor. The doors opened and they stepped off. Olivia inhaled a deep breath. She wanted to grab Elliot's hand and to have him give her hand a reassuring squeeze. Elliot looked at her and gave her a glance, asking silently if she was ready. Olivia nodded and the partners began on of their last walks into the squadroom together.


End file.
